Friday, September 26, 2008

White Trash Birthday

For some reason, whenever events transpire in Helen, GA, they can usually only be described as white trash and completely bizarre. Case-in-point: my birthday dinner at Edelweiss in Helen two years ago. Most of our friends have heard the story from our friends and first-hand witnesses, Janie and Adam, who attended the historic event, so I won't go into the details of the night. The highlights are that there was a crouton situation and Jesus came out of a Victoria's Secret bag.
Flash forward to Thursday night, and the Dunn family experienced yet another white trash birthday. It was my mom's birthday and as a treat we decided to go to Paul's in Helen for all-you-can-eat crab legs.
Let me first state that I love crab legs. They are the one food that brings out the total glutton/white trash in me. So we all meet at the restaurant - Me, David, my parents, and my two brothers. I had made my mom homemade Tiramisu for her birthday. David and I put it in a box and packed ice packs around it to keep it chilled. We walk into the restaurant with it and the hostess says, "I'm sorry, but we don't allow outside food in the restaurant. It's against the health code". Great. David takes it out to the car and we sit down at our table. For some reason, I decided to bring plates for the Tiramisu, but not forks. I told my family this and that we could eat the Tiramisu outside of the restaurant, if we had forks. My mom replied, "Well, then since they won't let us eat it in here, we'll just take take some of theirs." We wondered if she was serious. I should never doubt my mother.
So the crab legs came, and I out-ate everyone - 4 plates! I have developed a method for eating crab legs and I feel like I have reached nirvana when I am successful at getting all of the meat out of the leg intact. At an early point in the evening, my little brother decided to put his head down on the table and take a nap, because he knew that we would be there for, as I put it in my adopted white trash lingo, "the long haul". He and my dad actually ended up leaving early.
After they left, and we finished glutting ourselves on copious amounts of crab legs, I start to wonder if my mom is serious about the forks. As I'm thinking this, I see her begin to make her move. Luckily, she is still wearing her scrubs from work, so she has large pockets on the front of her shirt. I see her reach for the first fork- and she is successful. The whole time this is going on, all I can think in my head is "how awesome would this birthday be if my mom got caught stealing forks at a restaurant in Helen, GA?" Then she takes the second fork- and is successful again! My brother, Aron, looks mortified, but the deed is over. We go to the front and pay and make our quick exit to the parking lot.
My mom pulls out her stolen forks and we eat the cake on the back of my brother's car in the parking lot of Paul's Steakhouse.
We don't often have white trash moments, but last night was an awesome one! Every once in a while, everyone should experience one. If you want to experience one, but don't want to be alone in your experience, go to Helen, GA. You're sure to find many experts who can help you out.
I love my family and I have so much fun with them wherever we go!

Happy Birthday Mom! I love you!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Morgan! I had found your blog a long time ago and thought I added it to my reader... I was wondering why you never posted anything when I realized I must not have added you after all! You make me laugh. And I love how perfectly you write. I feel like a nicer person after reading/talking with you! I'll have to share with you one day what --I-- like to do with Tiramisu ;)